I specialize in working with people who have Borderline Personality Disorder. It’s primarily the one disorder nearly no therapists touch. These are clients who have terrible traumatic backgrounds, including any kind of physical/sexual/emotional abuse. Their parents never validated any of their emotions. They grew up to not even trust how they are feeling. They become emotionally extreme on every aspect because it’s the only way they trust what they are feeling. If they are mad they are fighting and yelling. If they are sad they are self harming and thinking about suicide. If they are nervous they are having a panic attack. Everything is extreme. They doubt who they are, they doubt how they feel, and they take over that invalidating habit their parents raised them on and start invalidating themselves the same way. They believe their friends will eventually find out who they really are and will start talking shit about them – so they always seem paranoid. They self-sabotage anytime something starts going well because they don’t like challenging the idea that “I’m not good enough”. So they tend to drop out of school with a month left, they cheat on their significant other so that they are the one who gets broken up with, they create controversy in jobs so they get fired. Anything to prove that they suck as a person . (All subconsciously of course).
I work with them to help provide the actual skills to live that their parents didn’t teach. I provide them ways to cope with negative feelings, I provide them ways to actually allow themselves to feel bad. We learn how to effectively and appropriately experience all emotions. As a Therapist, I help them learn that it’s not all their fault – and a lot of this is a product of their parents or upbringing. I help give them actual living skills to deal with other people and their own emotions. We learn how to identify toxic relationships and how to get out of them. We get better at finding healthy relationships. We learn how to deal with life when all these skills don’t work and shit literally hits the fan.
And I’m not nice all the time – I tell them what they don’t want to hear (but what they need to hear) . Sometimes my clients walk out of my office with their middle finger raised at me, but they always come back because it’s what they need to hear. I help provide them actual tools, we prepare for a plan for them to eventually leave therapy, and we do it. And it works. My people get better, and fast. They constantly tell me I’m far better than their other therapists that just tell them what they want to hear.
Michael Wildman is a Licensed Clinical Addiction Specialist (LCAS)
Changing what we do, how we act, or our thinking is not an easy thing to do. Likely, you’ve tried to make changes before or have spent time thinking about change. I enjoy being with clients in the in between place–in the place between the things that make changing difficult and the dreaming about improving your life. I spend time with people who feel stuck, and I do so without giving directions, making judgments, or pushing you into making changes.
There are no easy answers or recipes that work for everyone I believe that you have you need inside of you already to change your life for the better and my role is to help you take the steps that to realize those changes. I’ll help you set the goals that are right for you and help you draw upon your own strengths and desire for change to to make your dreams reality.
Michael Wildman is a Licensed Clinical Addiction Specialist (LCAS) in North Carolina. Michael has over 15 years experience working with people who are have problems due to drugs, alcohol, addiction, and related mental health concerns. He enjoys cooking, reading, photography, spending time with family, the mountains, and faith/spirituality.
To schedule an appointment with Michael, you may email him at firstname.lastname@example.org.